My Heart, His Words

Let the Words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your site, O Lord.


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Heart of Gratitude

psalm 118 1

Over the weekend, I spent some time shopping at my favorite Resale Shop My Sister’s Closet. While paying, the cashier asked about my weekend and if I had Labor Day off. I responded, “Yes I do, and I am so grateful.” Her response surprised me, when she had an expression of surprise as she said, “Wow! That’s not a term you hear much these days!” I smiled and replied, “Well, I have much to be grateful for; I am truly blessed”.

The cashiers surprise at my verbalization of gratitude really sunk deep into my heart as I began to think more about my own life expressions of gratitude.

If I’m honest, in the past two and a half years, I’ve become so consumed with starting and growing our business, that my life hasn’t always reflected one of gratitude, so today, I’d like to pause and give thanks to God for His tremendous blessings in my life during the past two years.

1) My heart is full because God has blessed me with a husband who loves me to the fullest. {Ecclesiastes 4:9-12} Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor:  If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”

2) Two years and four months ago my dad was diagnosed with cancer. I am so grateful for the time we have shared and will continue to share together until Jesus takes him home. {2 Samuel 24:14} “I am in great distress. Let us now fall into the hand of the LORD for His mercies are great, but do not let me fall into the hand of man.”

3) Within the past two and a half years, God has expanded our business.  I couldn’t be more grateful to be fulfilling a dream of mine to be self-employed and serving along side my husband in our business. {Luke 6:38} “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

4) Oh the joy that has come from seeing another goal achieved together, as God provided the means and blessed us with a beautiful house we call home. {Joshua 24:14} “As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

5) Late last year God provided the opportunity for my husband to have a vasectomy reversal, so we can expand our family.  I look forward to having a child of our own together one day… all in God’s time. {Psalm 37:4} Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

My life is truly blessed and my heart is truly grateful!

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In an effort to embrace a life of more purposeful, less distracted living, I am starting a new blogging series based on Rachel Macy Stafford’s book Hands Free Mama and am inviting you on my journey.  You may purchase the book here, or simply follow along as I blog through her Godly words of wisdom. After reading Bonnie Gray’s book Finding Spiritual Whitespace, my heart is longing for a lifestyle of balance and rest; Hands Free Mama is yet another tool God placed in my life for such a time as this.  Won’t you join me?

See you next week!

love satin2

I enjoy linking up with these (3) fabulous communities:
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You’re in Better Hands

taking my life back

In last week’s post “Be All There” I shared about my full-time job and my lack of peace in leaving yet, in order to work full-time on our business.

In 2012, when my husband and I first started Pelfreybilt Off-Road, God spoke this promise to me:

“I will always provide” 

He didn’t say He would provide sometimes, or maybe, or if I prayed hard enough, He said always. And He has always made good on that promise, even when it looked like bills would not be paid.  Always, God provided.

As you know, I typically post on Wednesday or Thursday, but this week that didn’t happen because I’ve been wrestling with God over this promise, and my fear of letting go and fully trusting Him.

I’ve been saying in one breath that I trust God and that He’s never failed me, yet in the next breath saying I’m afraid of letting go of a full time job that comes with the (false) security blanket of a steady income!

The reason I haven’t had peace about leaving my job, is because I’ve been waiting for peace to come after the black and white of our finances proved to me that God will provide. Instead of putting my complete trust in the One who promised to provide, instead of choosing to find my security in the only One who is secure, I’ve been clinging to something fleeting & temporary.

I have been clinging to my job for stability, instead of clinging to the Ultimate Stabilizer, the very one who stabilized the raging storms with three small words: “Peace, Be Still” (Mark 4:39)

False security and fear stems from unbelief in Jehovah Jireh, Our Provider.  (Genesis 22:14)

In my prayer time, God asked me “How can I fully bless you, when you won’t let go long enough to embrace what I’m giving you?”  He showed me, my lack of faith in His provision, has caused me to cling so tightly to my false security, that I couldn’t see the life and joy I was squeezing right out of my hands!

Lifeless

Joyless

Empty

Miserable

These have been the words of my heart as of late, as I desperately cling to false security.

I just started reading Hands Free Mama, by Rachel Macy Stafford, and in her intro she says these words:

“How do I do it all?
I miss out on life-that’s how I do it all.
I miss out on what truly matters;
and what I miss, I can’t get back.”

After wrestling with God, I actually sat down and looked over our finances and for the first time, began to see, that we truly could afford for me not to work anywhere but in our business.  God also opened my eyes to see the LIFE and JOY I will be regaining by taking this leap of faith!

I’m tired of missing out, so I’m letting go, friend! I gave my verbal resignation to my employer on Friday and will be leaving October 31, 2014.  (I’m helping with the hiring, training & transition process)

The peace and JOY that now floods my heart and mind is inexpressible!  I’m getting my life back, the one God has so richly blessed me with; I’m taking it back and releasing my fears to the One who holds my tomorrows and who promises to provide today!

I am truly in the best hands and so are you, sweet friend, so are you!

love satin2


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Journey to Rest (Week 2)

We often say, “Hindsight is 20/20”, yet do we ever take the time to denounce the false messages we’ve embraced for years? Or do we merely forge ahead without going any deeper, afraid of what might come to the surface?

On my journey to rest, Jesus is uncovering some falsehoods I’ve had about myself and rest.  As He’s doing this, my heart is unraveling and years of walls are crumbling. Behind these walls is a heart longing to just BE.  A heart longing for rest and contentment, in Jesus.

As a result of my heart unraveling, I decided it was time to write a letter to my younger self, denouncing the lies I’ve been embracing about myself and rest.

A Letter to My Younger Self

Dear Satin,

You are beautiful-just the way you are.
You don’t have to be a model to be perfect.
You don’t have to do anything to be loved.
In a world torn apart by anger and hatred,
Your smile and tender heart make you beautiful.

I know you don’t believe it now, but time passes quickly.
Don’t rush through life wishing for tomorrow;
Tomorrow will come quickly enough.
Just as quickly as the day arrives, it will pass.
Enjoy today. Live it to the fullest!

It’s okay to set goals, but remember to embrace today.
Savor each moment, don’t wish it away.
When you reach a goal, relish the moment.
Don’t meagerly celebrate, while shooting for the next goal.
Take joy in your accomplishments!
You did great! Be happy!

Don’t be ashamed of your gifts.
Using your gifts, doesn’t make you prideful.
Using your gifts, means embracing who God made, in you.
You don’t need to gloat, but it’s okay to embrace your gifts.
Be thankful for your gifts & return them to God, for His glory.

Don’t trust everyone; Guard your heart. (Like your Mom says!)
It’s good to be tenderhearted, but guard your heart.
Reserve the deepest part of your heart for Jesus;
Render Him Captain & never release it to any other.
No one will guard it any better, or steer it more perfectly.
Listen to His voice and follow His lead.

Understand that forgiveness often means letting go.
Letting go of the one(s) who hurt you.
Letting go of the pain & anger.
Letting go of the disappointment(s).
Letting go doesn’t mean you’re quitting!
Letting go means you deserve better and you’re moving on!

It’s okay to make mistakes!
You’re not bound to the mistakes you made,
You’re bound to your Forgiving Maker.
Let go of the guilt. Embrace Forgiveness.
Forgive yourself as easily as you forgive others.

Take time to rest
It’s okay to relax, even with looming “to do” lists.
It’s okay to steal away, and enjoy alone time.
It’s okay not to participate in everything you’re asked to do.
It’s okay to say “no”.

Saying no doesn’t make you a bad person.
Saying no doesn’t mean you’re weak.
Saying no doesn’t mean you’re incapable.
Saying no is the most powerful thing you can do for you!
Saying no frees you from being bound by expectations.
Just say no!

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How about you, friend?

Is there a falsehood you have embraced about yourself or rest that needs to be changed? I’d love to hear your story, or pray with you on your journey. Feel free to comment below, message me privately, or join us for Bonnie’s Whitespace Linkup.

love satin2

This post is part of a series entitled, “Journey to Rest”. 
Previous Posts:
Week 1

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findingspiritualwhitespace_book

You may purchase Finding Spiritual Whitespace, HERE.

This post is part of the, “Finding Spiritual Whitespace Blog Tour”
which I am honored to be a member,
along with a group of soulful, journeying kindreds.
To learn more or to join us, CLICK HERE!
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I enjoy linking up with these fabulous communities:
coffee for your heart-Button-250x250three word wednesdayWords-of-Life-200


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When Dreams Change

isaiah 43 19

I remember the moment as if it were yesterday.  Standing at the altar of our church, along with others, seeking God, with my hands lifted and heart open to His voice.  As clear as day, it was prophesied over me, that God would use my hands for His glory.

I am honored to have been invited to contribute on the God Sized Dreams Community.  Would you join me there to read the rest?

love satin

I enjoy linking up with these communities:

whitespace-badgecoffee for your heart-Button-250x250three word wednesdayWords-of-Life-200


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Take My Yoke

take my yoke

As I’ve mentioned before, God has called me into a season of rest, which is definitely a challenge to obey!  However, during this season, as I read Matthew 11:28-30 I find comfort, in a whole new way, so I’d like to share with you!

In my graphic above, I’ve highlighted the key words that spoke to me:

“I will give you REST

 “Take MY yoke”

“I am GENTLE

“You will find REST

“My yoke is EASY

“My burden is LIGHT

The recurring theme is REST: Finding rest in CHRIST.

Following the dream God’s placed on my heart, while good & purposeful can become an idol in itself if not done in obedience. ===>TWEET THIS

My zeal & my passion, while beneficial in many facets of my life, can also become a hindrance, when God calls me to a place of REST & I struggle to release & obey.

The God-sized dream God’s given me, opened doors for me to walk through, and I love walking, isn’t intended to be a burden. This dream isn’t intended to weigh me down, stress me out, or max out my days. This dream is supposed to come along side the life God’s called me to, and simply BE.

“BE still & know that I am God”.  More often than not, I’m guilty of going & doing so much that I forget to just BE. I forget to just allow God to work in me, as I stand still.

Taking the yoke of Christ is FREEING. It’s not a burden!

His Dream for me is Holy, not Heavy.

Walking my God-sized dream needs to be the same way!

So today, I choose to take His yoke for me… it’s light & I need light right now.

How about you, friend? Have you been spinning your hamster wheel, vigorously pursuing your dream, and forgetting to take time to rest? It’s time to fall off that wheel & on to your knees; finding comfort & rest in Christ.

Will you take His Yoke with me?

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link up time

I’m grateful to be linking up in two places today!
Holley Gerth on “Coffee for Your Heart”:

Coffee-for-Your-Heart-150
Simply Beth for “Three Word Wednesday“:
three word wednesday


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He Is More Than Enough

Have you ever been given a task, yet weren’t given all the tools required to complete the task? It leaves you feeling lost & sometimes like a failure waiting to happen, doesn’t it?

Well, I have good news for you, friend!  That dream God has placed on your heart? The dream you’re stepping out in faith to grasp? The dream your heart skips a beat for, when you talk about it?  Well, that God-given dream, has been given to you along with all the tools you need to make it happen!  Wanna know how I can be so confident of this?  Ephesians 3:20

eph 3 20 500
I realize this verse gets used a lot when we’re trying to encourage others to pray earnestly for a miracle, but that doesn’t mean it loses it’s power; it simply means we need to claim it in our own lives!

I’m not sure about you, but sometimes it’s a lot easier for me to read this verse and claim it for someone else, than it is to claim it for my own life!

However, there are some scriptures we can cling to when we’re looking at our dreams & asking God “how?”

  • God’s blessings know no limits or bounds; His gifts are perfect & without end. {James 1:17}
  • You were born for such a time as this; He gave this dream to YOU alone. {Esther 4:14}
  • Those He calls, He qualifies. {Romans 8:30}
  • He has your dream in His hands & He’ll work everything out perfectly {Jeremiah 29:11}
  • It may take time, but  your dream WILL be beautiful! {Ecclesiastes 3:11}

Rest assured, my friend, our God is able to do MORE than we could ever hope or imagine!

If He birthed your dream, He will breathe life into & anoint your dream… all in His perfect time!

Dream On!

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link up time
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Never Worthy, Forever Loved

I can completely relate to the Centurion man who went to Jesus asking Him to heal his servant who was at home, paralyzed & “dreadfully tormented”.  When Jesus responded with, “I will come and heal him.”, the Centurion quickly responded saying, “Lord, I am not worthy that You should come under my roof. But only speak a word, and my servant will be healed.”

When it comes to my dream of writing, I find myself feeling unworthy.  My heart declares, “Lord, I am not worthy that you should come under my roof” Friend, I don’t know about you, but my roof covers my fears, worries, doubts, imperfections, lack of faith & lack of belief.  I question, how could God use such imperfection? What do I have to offer anyone?

Then I read the next line in Scripture where the Centurion says, “But only speak a word, and my servant will be healed.” He believed! He knew that although he was not worthy, Jesus was capable of simply speaking a word & healing his servant.  He chose to believe!

When the Centurion vocalized his belief in Jesus, the response he received from Jesus was beautiful: “Assuredly, I say to you, I have not found such great faith, not even in Israel…Go your way; and as you have believed, so let it be done for you.” (by the way, his servant was healed!)

Although I don’t feel worthy, I know this is what God is calling me to do, so I walk in obedience & I choose to believe that what He has started in me He will be faithful to complete. (Philippians 1:6)

Although I don’t feel worthy, it’s not about me, it’s about Him. It is in my weakness that He is strongest anyway, so I will never be worthy enough.

Although I am not worthy enough, I am LOVED enough! In my imperfection, He still loves me! {Imagine that!}

If God has the ability to speak the world into motion & to heal with just a touch, He can certainly use flawed & messy me!

No, I may not be worthy, but Jesus is & to Him be all the glory.

shed-verse

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link up time
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photo credit-naphy