My Heart, His Words

Let the Words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your site, O Lord.


When Your Heart Is Overwhelmed

psalm 61.2

I can’t speak for you, but right now, my heart is completely overwhelmed!

Many things weigh heavy on my heart and mind, so Psalm 61:2 is a verse I am warmly embracing.

People I love…

Trying to be brave and strong on the outside, while crumbling on the inside; afraid, yet clinging to Jesus.

People I love…

Being handed their last paychecks, while bills pile up and no new job can be seen on the horizon.

People I love…

Given a diagnosis and a timeline that speaks utter hopelessness.

People I love…

Crippled from pain, without understanding why.


All around me, people I love are hurting.

Who am I to question the hand of God?

But it is I, even I, who sits here with tears streaming down her face, crying out to Him.

For answers

For healing

For provision

For peace

For Him to be Who He is at a time when fear grips ours hearts & threatens all that we know.

He is our ROCK!

When my heart is truly overwhelmed, with all that lies around and within me…

He is here.

Steady as can be; my Savior, my Comforter, my Peace, my Strength & my Rock. {Psalm 46:1}

At a time when the world screams “Where is God that He should allow this to happen?”

My heart is assured, that He is still God. He is Still good for his Word and His promises remain true. {Psalm 136:1}

Lifting my hands upward to Jesus and asking Him to envelope our questioning and hurting hearts today.

Thanking Him in advance for using this season to refine and prepare us for all He has in store! {1Peter 1:7}

satin signature



Most Perfect Curve

curves of a smile

While reading Ann Voskamp’s post it made me think of my husbands words most recently when I asked him how he really feels about me quitting my full-time job to pursue our business full-time.

“I feel good about it! I finally get my wife back!” Those words spoke two things to me:

  • My happiness is reflected in the smile upon my face
  • My husbands happiness is directly affected by own happiness

On my Journey to Rest I shared of my struggle to relinquish control, to ask for help and ultimately to trust God to be my provider in all things. Now, as my husband and I have made this life changing decision, I am pursuing a life of more purposeful, less distracted living.

Reading Hands Free Mama is really opening my eyes to just how much the happiness of my husband, stepson, our family and friends are all directly affected by my own happiness or the lack their of! As I mentioned before, I am truly blessed, and my heart has never lost sight of that. However, my life choices haven’t lent to reflecting the fruit of my gratitude because I haven’t allowed myself enough time for rest, nor have I been living a balanced life.

“In one simple, beautiful gesture, my daughter cemented
my newfound pursuit to live Hands Free.

I realized with clarity that thisthis pausing,
when the whole world keeps on going-is living.
{Rachel Macy Stafford}

Friends, it is our choice! We can choose to keep saying yes to the people and things that don’t matter, while saying no to those we love the most, or we can embrace a Hands Free, life that yields abundant joy, treasured memories and tremendous peace and health!

1 Corinthians 16:14 says “Let all you do be done in love,”

How can we fully love, if we are not fully present?

For some of us, technology is our weakness; email, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest. While for others of us, it’s our jobs or work.  I know for me, it’s been both! I’ve spent the past two and a half years, busting my bottom at a full-time job while trying to build a business with my husband that will sustain our family.  I don’t consider it a bad thing by any means, but I have had to make sacrifices on this journey.  I’ve sacrificed personal time, fitness and health. I’ve sacrificed family time and time with my husband.

While sacrifice is necessary to achieve any goal we set, there has to be balance and that is something I’ve struggled with over the years.

“I need to be reminded that I could complain less,
cherish more, let go of the have-tos,
and say yes more often.
I need to be reminded that although
sunsets and goodbyes happen every day,
each one should be treated as if it’s the last.
I need to be reminded that real living happens
when I peel away the distractions and
hold my perfectly imperfect life
tenderly in my hands.
And someday, I’ll be grateful I didn’t miss my life.”
{Rachel Macy Stafford}

So how about those curves?

Are you smiling?

Is your life so busy, you find yourself frustrated, in tears or on the brink of a break-down at any given moment? That’s been me for the past year and if that’s you today, I can’t encourage you enough to embrace this truth:

The only person who can protect my time is me!

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
Proverbs 4:23

 I hope you’ll join me on my #handsfree journey! I’d love to hear about yours as well!

love satin2

I enjoy linking up with these (3) fabulous communities:
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You’re in Better Hands

taking my life back

In last week’s post “Be All There” I shared about my full-time job and my lack of peace in leaving yet, in order to work full-time on our business.

In 2012, when my husband and I first started Pelfreybilt Off-Road, God spoke this promise to me:

“I will always provide” 

He didn’t say He would provide sometimes, or maybe, or if I prayed hard enough, He said always. And He has always made good on that promise, even when it looked like bills would not be paid.  Always, God provided.

As you know, I typically post on Wednesday or Thursday, but this week that didn’t happen because I’ve been wrestling with God over this promise, and my fear of letting go and fully trusting Him.

I’ve been saying in one breath that I trust God and that He’s never failed me, yet in the next breath saying I’m afraid of letting go of a full time job that comes with the (false) security blanket of a steady income!

The reason I haven’t had peace about leaving my job, is because I’ve been waiting for peace to come after the black and white of our finances proved to me that God will provide. Instead of putting my complete trust in the One who promised to provide, instead of choosing to find my security in the only One who is secure, I’ve been clinging to something fleeting & temporary.

I have been clinging to my job for stability, instead of clinging to the Ultimate Stabilizer, the very one who stabilized the raging storms with three small words: “Peace, Be Still” (Mark 4:39)

False security and fear stems from unbelief in Jehovah Jireh, Our Provider.  (Genesis 22:14)

In my prayer time, God asked me “How can I fully bless you, when you won’t let go long enough to embrace what I’m giving you?”  He showed me, my lack of faith in His provision, has caused me to cling so tightly to my false security, that I couldn’t see the life and joy I was squeezing right out of my hands!





These have been the words of my heart as of late, as I desperately cling to false security.

I just started reading Hands Free Mama, by Rachel Macy Stafford, and in her intro she says these words:

“How do I do it all?
I miss out on life-that’s how I do it all.
I miss out on what truly matters;
and what I miss, I can’t get back.”

After wrestling with God, I actually sat down and looked over our finances and for the first time, began to see, that we truly could afford for me not to work anywhere but in our business.  God also opened my eyes to see the LIFE and JOY I will be regaining by taking this leap of faith!

I’m tired of missing out, so I’m letting go, friend! I gave my verbal resignation to my employer on Friday and will be leaving October 31, 2014.  (I’m helping with the hiring, training & transition process)

The peace and JOY that now floods my heart and mind is inexpressible!  I’m getting my life back, the one God has so richly blessed me with; I’m taking it back and releasing my fears to the One who holds my tomorrows and who promises to provide today!

I am truly in the best hands and so are you, sweet friend, so are you!

love satin2


Journey to Rest (Week 6)

lisa leonard

I sat across the table, enjoying lunch with one of my best friends as tears streamed down my cheeks, “I’m struggling and I don’t know what to do.  My attitude sucks and I know it, but I can’t seem to snap out of this funk. I’m miserable.”

She lovingly shared some of her own advice on how to cope and encouraged me to change my perspective.  Later she sent me this quote via text:

“Life is ten percent what happens to you
and ninety percent how you respond to it.”
Lou Holtz

Truth be told, several of my dreams are right in front of me, yet still intangible. It’s like looking through the window at your favorite dessert, yet being unable to consume it.  That’s where I am right now and it is quite a struggle for my restless heart as I attempt to rest in Christ & trust His timing.  It challenges me as I daily fight having a bad attitude and being angry at my lack of understanding for God’s “not now” to my intangible dreams.

The quote my friend shared, opened my eyes to see that here I am: smack dab in the middle of my personal “storm”, focusing on the storm and not the Son.

Realizing this, I looked up and focused on the Son; quieting my heart and Resting in Him. As a result, He placed three hurting friends into my life, (the very next day), to whom I could speak Truth and encouragement!

Finally, brothers and sisters, fill your minds with beauty and truth.
Meditate on whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure,
whatever is lovely, whatever is good, whatever is virtuous and praiseworthy.

Philippians 4:8

As I was praying with one of my friends, the Holy Spirit gave me the visual image of a woman flailing her arms frantically in the middle of the ocean, to which He spoke, “The more you fight, with arms flailing, the harder you make it for me to reach out & rescue you. Rest in me & as you rest, I will rescue.”

Friend, so many times we try to “help” God rescue us or others we care about.

  • We react to an accusation, fumbling to defend ourselves, when silence is all God’s asking, because He wants to be our Defender.
  • We go, go, go, fighting rest & focusing on our “to do” list when He longs for us to sit alone with Him, so He can be our Restorer.
  • We flail our arms frantically looking for someone to rescue us from the pain, when He wants us to rest in Him so He can be our Healer.
  • We search in all the wrong places for affection, when all the while He desires to show us His perfect, unwavering love as our Lover.

Life is full of storms, some worse than others. It isn’t until we stop our flailing arms, lift them in full surrender & rest in Jesus Christ that He can rescue us.  When we stop trying, stop fighting & start trusting Jesus, He does His most beautiful work in us. Until then, all we do is hinder His rescue.

What storm is brewing in your life, how are you handling it & how can I pray for you?

love satin2

This post is part of a series entitled, “Journey to Rest”. 
Previous Posts:
Week 1
Week 2
::A Pause::
Week 3
Week 4
Week 5

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *


You may purchase Finding Spiritual Whitespace, HERE.

This post is part of the, “Finding Spiritual Whitespace Blog Tour”
which I am honored to be a member,
along with a group of soulful, journeying kindreds.
To learn more or to join us, CLICK HERE!

I enjoy linking up with these fabulous communities:
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The Gift of Rest is a Sound Mind

2 timothy 1 7

Parenting has the tendency to threaten our peace with fear, doesn’t it?

There are several ways the enemy can plant seeds of fear into our head, threatening to sink deep into our heart & destroy the peace that Jesus provides.

. . .

Please join me for the rest of this post, over at Five Minutes for Faith, where I am deeply honored to be a Contributing Writer.

love satin2






Rest Rains Blessings

In a few previous posts I mentioned that God was calling me into a season of rest, to which I’ve been reluctantly following.

Don’t get me wrong, my life has been chaotic & busier than ever, yet in the midst of the chaos, I have found deep joy & contentment.

You see, when God called me into this season, I didn’t fully understand what it meant, or even what rest looked like. To me, it sounded like a sunny day, sitting on the beach with the ocean breeze in my hair, a good book in hand, and my hubby beside me.

Ah well, God had another sort of rest in mind for me. {smile}

I entered this season of rest, by cutting back on the one thing in my life that I enjoy the most: writing.  It hurt to let go, but I laid it down because God asked me to.  Honestly, I did it with some attitude, but He didn’t seem to mind one bit. {smile}

Other than cutting back on my writing, my life actually picked up speed, which made me more frustrated and left me questioning, “Rest? Seriously? You call this rest, God?”


When The Call to Rest Brings Blessings

Within the past month, I have watched the hand of God utterly down-pour blessings I could never have imagined.  My reluctant obedience to rest, has yielded blessings so big, my heart is still bursting with joy & gratitude!

God opened the door for us to buy our first home at a time in our lives when we weren’t looking, because we didn’t believe we were ready! He provided in ways we still don’t understand!  The home-buying experience was seamless from start to finish, just as He whispered to my heart that it would be.

God filled the longing of my heart to be a part of a community of Christian Step Mama’s, by opening the doors for me to co-lead an (in)courage small group that starts this Spring!  I’m looking forward to getting to know each of the ladies who join the group & trusting that He will provide encouragement through me as well as for me!

God has blessed me with incredible friendships as a result of my writing.  Friends I didn’t think I needed or even wanted, yet who have embraced me, encouraged me, prayed for me, love me for me & have become like family.

You see, I had to be willing to let go.  To obey.  By placing my obedient, emptied hands before God, He could fill them with blessings they could not contain.  I emptied myself before God, trusted Him with my heart & He blessed beyond measure!

The one thing I have learned in this season of rest, is this:

Rest Is Simply Obedience

Each season of rest God calls us to will look different, as our lives turn here & there. The key is not to know what rest looks like, but to embrace that it is pure obedience to His voice; laying aside whatever it is He’s asking of us, in the current season.

So rest assured my friend; whatever season God calls you to, it will be the best season of your life, for it is a season of obedience!

5.6.14 ecclesiastes 36

love satin


 link up time
I am so grateful for the opportunity to be part of three amazing writing communities.
Won’t you join me over at the blogs of three of my sweat friends?

Holley Gerth, with Coffee for your Heart

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Simply Beth, with Three Word Wednesday

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Rebekah A Hughes with Words of Life Wednesday

A Soft Gentle Voice


Reveling in “Wait”

As I embrace this season of “wait” & “rest”, the Holy Spirit gave me this understanding and I could hardly wait to share with you!

revel in the wait & rest

Wherever you might be on your journey, may you join me in reveling in the here & now.

May you look up to Christ, and focus on Him, rather than that mountain your facing.

And may you bask in His promise to move that mountain, & make something beautiful from it’s ashes.

Appreciate your love & encouragement on this journey!

How may I pray for you today?

Much Love,

love satin


link up time

three word wednesday