My Heart, His Words

Let the Words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your site, O Lord.


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A Scarlet Letter Covered By Love

While I haven’t been able to write nearly as often as my heart longs to, this season of my life is overflowing with God’s goodness and love.  My heart is busting at the seams with gratitude for all He is doing in and through me.

I am honored to be part of several amazing writing communities and one of them is Circles of Faith.

Elise and Kimberly recently asked if they could share my God-Sized Dreams Back Story and with great delight, I agreed.

Today, my post is live on Circles of Faith.  Will you join me in rejoicing over God’s redemptive love at work in my life?

CLICK HERE>> A Scarlet Letter Covered By Love

As always, thank you for your love, support and encouragement as I walk in obedience to the call God has placed on my life, “For such a time as this” {Esther 4:14}

love satin 2015


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A Year of Believing

One year ago, today, I created this writing space and ventured into the unknown, sharing my heart and God’s Word.

A lot has happened in the past year and I would like to recap on a few key moments.

  • I started the year by setting three New Years Resolutions and am still working through the first one, been off and on with the second one, and with God’s provision, successfully achieved the third one! While it’s not 100% success, it’s still growth and for that I am excited!
  • I acknowledged the word God laid on my heart for 2014 as BELIEVE, as well as the phrase for my family as This is Only the Beginning.
  • I named two of my dreams: 1) Having a baby and 2) Writing, and continue to trust God’s timing for both while embracing the unnamed, yet now active dream of business ownership/self-employment.
  • God opened the door for me to co-lead an (in)courage small group for Step Mama’s. My obedience yielded personal growth, friendships, encouragement and support on my journey as a Step Mama.
  • I read through Bonnie Gray’s book Finding Spiritual Whitespace and started my personal Journey to Rest which has proven to be an area God is perfecting in my life!
  • Through my blog, God taught me many different lessons this year, but here are a few of my favorites:
    • The place where I am most vulnerable, the place where I am the purest, is a place where the tears flow freely and my heart-message can be heard. When Tears Fall
    • “Trust me. Trust my timing. I’m never early, I’m never late. My ways aren’t your ways; they are better. Trust me.” {God} What’s Next?
    • To LOVE is to be at War with the enemy Guest post for Holley Gerth
    • The journey of waiting doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. So I Wait
    • “I will always provide” {God} You’re in Better Hands
    • “How do I do it all? I miss out on life-that’s how I do it all. I miss out on what truly matters; and what I miss, I can’t get back.” Hands Free Mama
    • Believing God isn’t about seeing the results today! Believing God is about seeing His direction today and trusting His promises for tomorrow! Choosing to Believe

2014 was a year of actively living my belief in God’s provision, and day after day God remains faithful to his promise!

I stand in awe of His goodness, provision, strength and protection over me and my family.

As I face 2015, I can’t help but wonder what God has in store.  Whether it be rain or shine, sickness or health, prosperity or loss, “My God shall supply all my needs according to His Riches in Glory by Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19)

With only two days until the start of a new year, I am still unclear as to what my word of the year will be, or what phrase God has for my family. However, Philippians 1:6 is a verse I am clinging to as I step into the new year!philippians 1 vs6Thank you for an amazing year! I pray God’s richest blessings be yours in 2015!

love satin 2015


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Making Room for Christ in Christmas

matthew 25.40

Christmas has always been my favorite holiday, yet with the increasing commercialism, I find it difficult to see Christ in Christmas at all…

…Unless I make room for Him.

Long ago, no one made room for Jesus in the inn, and instead He was born in a lowly manger among the “least of these”.

Somehow we often get fixated on making Christmas perfect with the tree, decorations, and baking cookies yet, that isn’t what Christmas is all about.  While those things are festive and fun, the real truth behind Christmas is about making room for Christ every single day.

  • Praying for, supporting and encouraging our spouse.
  • Teaching our child(ren) the true meaning of Christmas and how to walk with Jesus.
  • Spending time with our parents, helping them and enjoying their company.
  • Writing an email, sending a text, or mailing a card to a friend in need.
  • Showing love and compassion to a perfect stranger.

When our focus becomes less about the commercialized Christmas season and more about Christ, we are able to see the extraordinary in the ordinary.

By making room for Christ:
We open our eyes to a world in need of a Savior,
and willingly become His hands & feet extended in love.

By making room for Christ: 
It becomes less about tradition, and more about inclusion,
as we insure that those around us feel loved every day of the year.

By making room for Christ:
We open our arms wide, laying aside our differences,
and see each other as children of God, making us the family of God.

As we enjoy the Christmas festivities and time with family and friends, may we focus on making room for Christ, turning this season into a joyous time of LOVE.  After all, it was LOVE that was born in that manger long ago and it is LOVE that lives within us!

Let LOVE live among us!

I would really enjoy hearing how you plan to make room for Christ this Christmas Season!  Won’t you share?


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When Your Dream Looks Different Than You Imagined

It’s funny how we imagine our dreams to look one way, yet they turn out looking totally different, isn’t it?

I imagined that working from home would give me a set schedule with set hours. Having a set schedule would enable me to pack my hubby’s lunch, and make his morning coffee, see him off to work and then do my morning devotions. I envisioned doing my morning exercise routine, having breakfast and getting myself ready for the day. After that, I’d be ready to work; stopping for lunch and taking breaks to play fetch with our two beautiful dogs, while doing laundry, keeping the house clean and prepping for dinner!

That’s not at all how my day looks! The dream of being an at-home business owner, while playing super-wife, super-woman and super-step mama, is not super-REAL! Instead, it’s super-HARD!

That schedule I thought I would have? Turns out it’s not as easy to maintain now that I don’t have an employer’s time clock to punch! Instead, my new schedule requires that I am accountable to myself. My new schedule requires that I set my own boundaries so I’m not answering business emails during meal time, quite time, or family time. Not giving in to the constant pull of social media, trying to dictate my every move in order to make a sale, has proven to be a big challenge to my boundary setting and my personal journey to rest.

If I’m honest with myself I have to admit, the dream I had in my head looks totally different than I envisioned. Is that bad? No. However, it’s certainly more difficult than I thought it would be.  All the people I worked with for the past seven years? I miss them; they became family to me and I miss that connection.  That time clock I punched? While I didn’t like having to punch in daily, now that I don’t have to, I miss the familiarity and consistency of knowing my hours and expectations.  That set paycheck? I miss that too; it’s no longer the responsibility of my employer, rather it’s become my personal responsibility!

Bottom line? I’ve been feeling as if the entire weight of responsibility is on my shoulders and it’s been killing me! I’ve cried a lot, stopped writing, or reaching out to my friends, all in an effort to not to be a burden to anyone, but the truth is, I’m sad and feel like I’m walking this journey alone.  While I know I’m right where God wants me, it still makes me feel like the new kid in town. This dream turned out to be very different than I imagined and this change is difficult and painful.

The amazing and beautiful thing about this journey is that, in my honesty before God, He always meets me in a powerful way.

The other morning while I was doing my devotions, as I shared my fears, worries and sadness, the Holy Spirit whispered these words to my heart:

“You don’t have to try so hard.
My provision is a promise I gave you;
It’s not something you can attain.
I will always provide~trust me”

Isaiah 43:19 has become one of my favorite verses, as I choose to cling to His promises.

psalm 43.19

I share all this with you in an effort to provide you with some encouragement. Regardless of where we are in our dream, if God calls us there, He will not only qualify us, but provide for us, and He will BE everything we need. He is doing a new thing & making a way where there seems to be no way.

Thank you for your love, support and encouragement along my journey; it is comforting to know I have you in my corner, praying for me and cheering me on; I hope to provide the same for you!

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When Your Heart Is Overwhelmed

psalm 61.2

I can’t speak for you, but right now, my heart is completely overwhelmed!

Many things weigh heavy on my heart and mind, so Psalm 61:2 is a verse I am warmly embracing.

People I love…

Trying to be brave and strong on the outside, while crumbling on the inside; afraid, yet clinging to Jesus.

People I love…

Being handed their last paychecks, while bills pile up and no new job can be seen on the horizon.

People I love…

Given a diagnosis and a timeline that speaks utter hopelessness.

People I love…

Crippled from pain, without understanding why.

~

All around me, people I love are hurting.

Who am I to question the hand of God?

But it is I, even I, who sits here with tears streaming down her face, crying out to Him.

For answers

For healing

For provision

For peace

For Him to be Who He is at a time when fear grips ours hearts & threatens all that we know.

He is our ROCK!

When my heart is truly overwhelmed, with all that lies around and within me…

He is here.

Steady as can be; my Savior, my Comforter, my Peace, my Strength & my Rock. {Psalm 46:1}

At a time when the world screams “Where is God that He should allow this to happen?”

My heart is assured, that He is still God. He is Still good for his Word and His promises remain true. {Psalm 136:1}

Lifting my hands upward to Jesus and asking Him to envelope our questioning and hurting hearts today.

Thanking Him in advance for using this season to refine and prepare us for all He has in store! {1Peter 1:7}

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Not Right Now

I’ve talked a lot lately about the journey of transition I’m currently walking and friend, it’s a hard road, let me tell you.

Amidst these changes, I am struggling to have words from my heart, or even the time to share, in this beautiful space.

I keep hearing Jesus whispering to my heart, “not right now” and it’s been a bit difficult for me to embrace.  In all honesty, I’ve been fighting it, not wanting to let go; scared I’m going to miss out!

I am a passionate woman! I put my heart and soul into everything I do, or I don’t do it at all.  I love writing, so not having the words, or time to do so, has been painful.  Laying it down and trusting God’s timing is truly a test of my faith.

Yet that is what I’m doing.

While I’m not closing my blog, for this season, I cannot commit to the weekly postings I’ve done in the past.

I need your mercy.

I need your understanding.

I need your support and prayers.

Because, I need to walk in obedience, and honor God’s call on my life at this time.

Instead of writing here; instead of pouring my heart into my blog… He is calling me to use that same passion to grow Pelfreybilt Off-Road, Inc, and use my gifts to do so.

This isn’t the way I envisioned my dream of writing turning out. {God asking me to pause from it}

However, I couldn’t be more thrilled about this new chapter. Business ownership makes me incredibly proud! It too is a life-long dream, that because of God’s blessing and my husband’s brilliant mind, I get the opportunity to run a business with him!  It’s a humbling and honoring chapter of my life and I want to give it my very best.

I refuse to hold on to what is comfortable.

I refuse to hold on to what was once desired.

Instead, I’m choosing to reach out, in faith, and cling to the hand of Jesus as He leads me forward.

Instead, I’m letting go of my preconceived notions and trusting God with each of my tomorrows.

Less planning. Less earthly stability.

More Jesus. More security.

You see, my life is not my own-it was bought with the Ultimate price, and I cannot live it modestly.

I am choosing to live it vivaciously!

“Lay It Down” written by Jaci Valasquez, truly captures this season of my life and I hope it will bless you as much as it’s blessing me.

Thank you for your love and encouragement. God has richly blessed me your loving heart, surrounding and covering me in prayer & I covet that so much right now.

Until Next Time.

With Love,

Satin

 


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Shine On, Friend!

sunshine begins

“He will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy.” {Job 8:21}

Life is full of disappointments, stress and pain, but we have a promise that amidst our deepest valleys, there is One who will fill our mouth with laughter and give us JOY from deep within!

I know many of you are experiencing some extremely challenging times. You’ve lost jobs, lost loved ones, or received bad news about someone you love.  A spouse walked out, you’ve been diagnosed with a disease that has no cure, or you’ve even lost a piece of yourself amidst your pain.  Think of Job. He had everything. God had blessed him abundantly… then he lost it all.

What was Job’s response to his loss?

Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him” {Job 13:15}

Did Job deny his anguish and pretend his journey was “peachy keen”? Absolutely not! He bore his soul to God, crying out for mercy, and with anguish, he begged for deliverance from his affliction.

Us, my friend, are called to do the same thing; to pour our hearts out to our Loving Father, who knows our hearts and longs to comfort us when we are hurting.

Amidst Job’s affliction he found these words:

“Look, I go forward, but He is not there,
And backward, but I cannot perceive Him;
When He works on the left hand, I cannot behold Him;
When He turns to the right hand, I cannot see Him.
But He knows the way that I take;
When He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold.
My foot has held fast to His steps;
I have kept His way and not turned aside.
I have not departed from the commandment of His lips;
I have treasured the words of His mouth
More than my necessary food.”
{Job 23:8-12}

Friend, when we hit our knees and pour our hearts out to God, He hears us! Often we do not see His hand at work, no matter what we do. Sometimes He doesn’t heal us, sometimes He doesn’t give us what we’re asking for and sometimes He allows more pain than we ever thought we could endure…

But He is always, always there.

He is REFINING us.

He is MOLDING us.

He is HOLDING us.

And when He is done, we will Shine like the Son, for His righteousness will shine through us like never before & we will behold his glory, in everything we do and say.

He IS our Redeemer.

He IS our Provider.

He IS our Everything.

May you cling to His promises, without seeing them come to fruition.

May you allow His JOY to deeply root within your heart, so His joy radiates within your smile.

Shine on, my friend, the Son is within you, Shine on!

love satin2

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