My Heart, His Words

Let the Words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your site, O Lord.


When Your Heart Is Overwhelmed

psalm 61.2

I can’t speak for you, but right now, my heart is completely overwhelmed!

Many things weigh heavy on my heart and mind, so Psalm 61:2 is a verse I am warmly embracing.

People I love…

Trying to be brave and strong on the outside, while crumbling on the inside; afraid, yet clinging to Jesus.

People I love…

Being handed their last paychecks, while bills pile up and no new job can be seen on the horizon.

People I love…

Given a diagnosis and a timeline that speaks utter hopelessness.

People I love…

Crippled from pain, without understanding why.


All around me, people I love are hurting.

Who am I to question the hand of God?

But it is I, even I, who sits here with tears streaming down her face, crying out to Him.

For answers

For healing

For provision

For peace

For Him to be Who He is at a time when fear grips ours hearts & threatens all that we know.

He is our ROCK!

When my heart is truly overwhelmed, with all that lies around and within me…

He is here.

Steady as can be; my Savior, my Comforter, my Peace, my Strength & my Rock. {Psalm 46:1}

At a time when the world screams “Where is God that He should allow this to happen?”

My heart is assured, that He is still God. He is Still good for his Word and His promises remain true. {Psalm 136:1}

Lifting my hands upward to Jesus and asking Him to envelope our questioning and hurting hearts today.

Thanking Him in advance for using this season to refine and prepare us for all He has in store! {1Peter 1:7}

satin signature



You’re in Better Hands

taking my life back

In last week’s post “Be All There” I shared about my full-time job and my lack of peace in leaving yet, in order to work full-time on our business.

In 2012, when my husband and I first started Pelfreybilt Off-Road, God spoke this promise to me:

“I will always provide” 

He didn’t say He would provide sometimes, or maybe, or if I prayed hard enough, He said always. And He has always made good on that promise, even when it looked like bills would not be paid.  Always, God provided.

As you know, I typically post on Wednesday or Thursday, but this week that didn’t happen because I’ve been wrestling with God over this promise, and my fear of letting go and fully trusting Him.

I’ve been saying in one breath that I trust God and that He’s never failed me, yet in the next breath saying I’m afraid of letting go of a full time job that comes with the (false) security blanket of a steady income!

The reason I haven’t had peace about leaving my job, is because I’ve been waiting for peace to come after the black and white of our finances proved to me that God will provide. Instead of putting my complete trust in the One who promised to provide, instead of choosing to find my security in the only One who is secure, I’ve been clinging to something fleeting & temporary.

I have been clinging to my job for stability, instead of clinging to the Ultimate Stabilizer, the very one who stabilized the raging storms with three small words: “Peace, Be Still” (Mark 4:39)

False security and fear stems from unbelief in Jehovah Jireh, Our Provider.  (Genesis 22:14)

In my prayer time, God asked me “How can I fully bless you, when you won’t let go long enough to embrace what I’m giving you?”  He showed me, my lack of faith in His provision, has caused me to cling so tightly to my false security, that I couldn’t see the life and joy I was squeezing right out of my hands!





These have been the words of my heart as of late, as I desperately cling to false security.

I just started reading Hands Free Mama, by Rachel Macy Stafford, and in her intro she says these words:

“How do I do it all?
I miss out on life-that’s how I do it all.
I miss out on what truly matters;
and what I miss, I can’t get back.”

After wrestling with God, I actually sat down and looked over our finances and for the first time, began to see, that we truly could afford for me not to work anywhere but in our business.  God also opened my eyes to see the LIFE and JOY I will be regaining by taking this leap of faith!

I’m tired of missing out, so I’m letting go, friend! I gave my verbal resignation to my employer on Friday and will be leaving October 31, 2014.  (I’m helping with the hiring, training & transition process)

The peace and JOY that now floods my heart and mind is inexpressible!  I’m getting my life back, the one God has so richly blessed me with; I’m taking it back and releasing my fears to the One who holds my tomorrows and who promises to provide today!

I am truly in the best hands and so are you, sweet friend, so are you!

love satin2


When You Feel Like Throwing In The Towel

the word of god i live

Ever have days, when life is beyond overwhelming? When there’s too many tasks & people needing you “right now” and the most important things in your life seem to be suffocating beneath the towel you’re contemplating throwing in!?

Parenting is HARD; step-parenting is harder, and sometimes I honestly feel like throwing in the towel & running for cover!

To read the rest of this post, please join me over at 5 Minutes for Faith where I am honored to be a contributing writer.

love satin

I also enjoy linking up with these communities:

coffee for your heart-Button-250x250three word wednesday



God showed up to my mess…

No-Matter-What-by-Holley-GerthI really needed to hear these priceless words from my friend Holley, as I read today’s post, “When You Mess Up“.

You see, after getting a speeding ticket & being required to go to 16 hours of traffic school this weekend I’ve been frustrated & angry with myself.  I kept saying, “what a waste of time”, when my time is so limited.

Well, God showed up to my traffic class.  No, the instructor wasn’t a pastor and I certainly wasn’t surrounded by Christians, nonetheless, God showed up & met me in the thick of my mess.

It was through my traffic school “Stress” exercise that God whispered to my angry self, “rest, child, rest”.  The exercise required me to write down several things that are causing stress in my life, then list how the stress is affecting me & follow that up with how I can eliminate the stress from my life.

The stress exercise required honesty, not for anyone else but myself. As I looked at the words on my paper, it became glaringly obvious that while I’d put myself in this mess, that God in His mercy, was meeting me in my mess & wanting to set me free.  The choice is mine as to whether I will walk in my new found freedom, or if I will resort to those old ugly habits that bind me from the inside out.

Being a Type-A personality, my struggle isn’t being motivated, instead, my struggle is to REST. With an already full schedule, I struggle saying no. I struggle setting healthy boundaries with my schedule & I struggle delegating as I attempt to use my gifts to help others.

I love how Holley points out this beautiful truth:

You will mess up. More than once. And you are not the first human being to do something that’s too big for God to redeem. Whatever you do cannot undo who he is.  So don’t ask yourself, “What have you done?” Instead ask God, “What have you done?” Remember his love, faithfulness and forgiveness. Then dare to ask him this question too: “What do you still want to do?”  This isn’t the end because he’s never giving up on you.

I was so relieved when I read those words because it truly is amazing to watch God take something broken & make it beautiful!  This weekend was very humbling, but I can honestly say that I walked away with a renewed sense of peace, & feeling rested.  God used my mess to break me, mold me & make something beautiful from it.

psalm 40 2

The challenge will come in my day to day activities:

  • Will I say yes, in an attempt to please, or will I say no and choose to REST?
  • Will I take on one more tasks, or ask for help and choose to REST?
  • Will I choose to schedule one more thing, or choose to REST?

Today, I’m making a commitment to start living this verse:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
Matthew 11:28 NIV



Encouragement for your heart

There’s something beautiful about encouraging someone else when we’re the ones needing encouragement the most.

Reaching out to someone when we’re hurting changes our focus from:

inward to upward

As we seek the One who gives healing, hope & life on behalf of someone else, we’re no longer able to stay in our own mud of:

mud of discouragmeent

Focusing our energy & emotions on encouraging another person in need, forces us to focus on God’s goodness surrounding us!

So next time you’re feeling discouraged, alone or hurting, as you share your struggle with a trusted friend, be prepared to give some encouragement as well.

Remember that it is in our struggle, that Jesus is working His best.

through us & to us

You were born for such a time as this Esther 4:14
Jesus holds you in the palm of His hand Isaiah 49:16
You are not alone Matthew 28:20

He’s numbered all your days Psalm 139:16
You are precious to Him Psalm 139:17

You are loved beyond measure Jeremiah 31:3

Have a blessed weekend!


link up time

Today I’m linking up with Shelley for
recommendation saturday


Perfection Not Necessary

Ever have a day when everything seems to be going wrong & all you want to do is crawl back in bed & claim a “do-over”?

I DO! There are days when I wake up feeling off & my day just seems to follow suit. My skin is less than “cover-girl” ready, my hair is frizzy & I feel bloated!  I get to work & my inbox is overflowing & before I even have a chance to settle in at my desk, people are bombarding me with requests or problems they need my help resolving.

Days like that are exhausting & can be so discouraging. Then I feel guilty for feeling exhausted & discouraged!  However, one thing I’m {newly} learning to embrace {slowly} is the idea that Perfection is not Necessary! It’s perfectly normal to get exhausted, overwhelmed & even frustrated!

Don’t laugh; if you’ve read any of my previous posts, I’ve admitted that I crave order & truly struggle with chaos & my own unrealistic expectations of perfection in my life. Embracing the reality that God does not expect perfection from me is a struggle, but one I’m learning nonetheless.

2 corinthians 129

So today, wherever you may be, however you are feeling, I’d like to whisper some encouragement to your beautiful heart!

Regardless of how your day looks, look to the One to gave you the day & remember that perfection is not what He’s asking of you today (or ever!)

The circumstances of your day may not change! You may falter, you may fail, you may struggle & you may hurt, but keep that pretty face looking UP!

Friend, we’re all a mess without Jesus & we’re even a mess with Jesus.  The beauty of that is He loves messy & He loves broken because with a yielded heart, He can clean up our messy & put the broken pieces of our heart back together again!

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.”
Jeremiah 31:3 NIV

Perfection Not Necessary Sweet Friend!


link up time

I just love Wednesdays, because I get the privilege of linking up in two places:

Coffee-for-Your-Heart-150 with Holley Gerth


three word wednesday
with Simply Beth


You’re beautiful…just as you are. (Recycled)

Today I’m over at Faith Barista’s JamWithMe Thursday.   I’m recycling my post from Tuesday because I believe the message really needs to be heard!  I’m hoping to remind you of just how beautiful you really are~always!

My “catch phrase” if you will, seems to be, “I am a daughter of the King, a humble work in progress; flawed & messy sometimes, but what you see is what you get!” I often feel the need to disclose just how flawed & messy I really am sometimes, for fear that people will put me on a pedestal and hold me to a standard to which I will fall.  Friends, I am so broken! I need Jesus; I simply cannot live this life without Him and because of my insecurities, my past failures & my struggles I call myself “one hot mess”! {smile with tears}

Sometimes I feel like I’m living a double life. There’s the life I want to live; where the picket fence is white & the grass is freshly cut. Where I never say a bad word, never think an impure thought & always reflect Jesus in everything I do and say. Then there’s the life I actually live. The one where I get short tempered, I say things I shouldn’t, as Holley says, I am misunderstood, and I fall flat on my face in frustration & self-disappointment.  I don’t have it altogether. I really want to, but I don’t. That my friend is the real me.

I’m just so very thankful:

  1. That Jesus looks at my heart & not my exterior. 
    “The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7
  2. That I have the gift of forgiveness & can fall on my face in humility & receive it from Jesus.
    “Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, Whose sin is covered.” Psalm 32:1
  3. That Jesus sees who He wants me to be, and loves me where I am.
    “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” 2 Corinthians 5:17
  4. That each day is a new day, with a clean slate.
    “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassion’s never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23
  5. That Jesus promises to make my “hot mess” beautiful; in His time.
    “He has made everything beautiful in its time.” Ecclesiastes 3:11

Knowing that Jesus sees me as beautiful, even when all I see is a hot mess, is pretty encouraging! To know He can look beyond my mess today, into a future where I’m perfected in Him, is truly amazing!  “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

How beautiful you are

So today, go easy on yourself. Keep in mind that we’re all a work in progress & that regardless of how much mud we get on our faces when we fall, He still calls us beautiful!